• Bernadette Henry

5 Liberating Comebacks For Anyone Who Tries To Mom-Shame You Postpartum (Inspired by Beyoncé’s “Fupa


I recently did an interview with Rich Thurman III on Facebook, for his "Live with Coach RT3” show, discussing all things jump rope fitness, and addressing some real-life issues that all of us busy, working moms face every day. The topic of Beyoncé’s recent statement, (in an interview for Vogue magazine) about “embracing her fupa”, came up during the interview, and that’s what inspired this post for today.

"Whenever I’m ready to get a six-pack, I will go into beast zone and work my ass off until I have it. But right now, my little FUPA and I feel like we are meant to be." ~ Beyoncé, Vogue Magazine Cover Interview

I thought that it would be fun for me to give you some solid comebacks to use, when your haters try to body shame, or “mom-shame” you, about your post-baby body.

So let’s jump right in (no pun intended lol)!

5 Liberating Comebacks For Anyone Who Tries To Mom-Shame You Postpartum (Inspired by Beyoncé’s “Fupa"):

1. “I’m Embracing My Fupa”! In the words of Beyoncé, "you and your little fupa are meant to be"! So embrace your post-baby body. Who said that you should look the way another woman looks (who’s never had a baby before), or that you should look like those (rare) Instagram fit women who have “snapped back” post-baby? If that’s not your truth, then guess what? You’re in great company! Most women do NOT look exactly the same way after having a baby as they did beforehand, and you shouldn’t either. Your body has undergone a tremendous transformation, from the inside out, to grow and birth another human being. That is incredible! It’s something to be proud of! Plus, as a postpartum mom, you've just gone through major life changes; not just physically, but mentally, and emotionally too. No matter how you may feel about how your post-baby body looks, it is the body that created that wonderful human being whom you love more than life itself. So embrace your “fupa”, and feel beautiful, sexy, and confident in the skin that you’re currently in. Pull a Beyoncé, and tell your haters to have several seats.

2. “Healthy” is not a size. Know the difference between internal fitness, and the external “appearance" of being fit. Being fit is not a size. Being healthy is not a size. There are people of all different shapes and sizes, who are healthy and unhealthy. It’s not about a number on the scale. Being fit has a lot more to do with your internal stamina, body conditioning, strength, flexibility, and the health of your internal organs, etc. So although I may get a lot of flack from people, because I don’t fit their ideal of what an active, healthy, and fit person should look like, the truth is this; I can run circles around most of the “fit” people who have something negative to say about my size, when it comes to my stamina and conditioning. Many “fit" people cannot jump rope for longer than one minute, without being completely out of breath, and needing a break. Case in point.

3. I will not compare myself to other moms.”You’re just making excuses” they say. “You need to just get it done” they say. Blah, blah, blah. Listen, your challenges, struggles, support system (or lack thereof), and circumstances are unlike anyone else’s. No one knows what you’re going through on a day to day basis, only you do. So while other people may claim that you’re just “making excuses” because you don’t workout seven days a week (or even 5), you have to make the choice to not compare yourself to other moms. You guys hear me say this all the time, because it’s true! We all have different resources, schedules, responsibilities, and levels of support. Maybe your situation would be different if you had more help at home, or at work, and you didn’t have to do everything that you do every single day. Accept where you are, and do the best you can in your situation, and don't compare yourself to other moms.

4. I’m having fun, are you? When I created Make It Fun NYC, the whole premise behind the name was that when I’m jumping rope, I’m having fun (as you can see from my videos lol), and I believe that working out should be fun! Why would you be motivated to get up every day and workout, if it is a miserable experience? Where’s the fun in that? Jumping rope gives me life! But guess what? While I’m over here having fun, I’m also getting an intense, challenging, full-body workout. Can your haters say the same? Are they miserable throughout their entire workout? Do they look forward to it? Do they actually enjoy the challenges of their workout? This is why I like to jump to music, do different tricks, and mix it up all the time. It helps to keep my jump rope workouts fun and interesting, and keeps me motivated to keep going, because I’m actually enjoying what I’m doing, and you should too! For busy, working moms, a jump rope class or workout is ideal because it allows you to get in a challenging, full-body workout, in a short period of time. So even if you only have 10 or 15 minutes, you can still get in a great workout, and have fun while you’re doing it.

5. I’m just keeping it real. I think that one of the things that attracts people to me in real life, and online, is my authenticity. I keep it real. I show you the good, the bad, and the ugly. I don’t hide things from you guys. Whether things are up or down, I’m here being me, sharing my journey with you. I see so many “Instagram fitness gurus” only share their journey when they’re in their best shape, or in their “after” body. But then they disappear for six months or a year, when they happen to go through some hard times, and put on some weight. I choose not to do that. I keep it real and consistent on social media, no matter where I am in my health and fitness journey, and you should too. Let people judge you. Who cares! The reason why I’ve connected with so many awesome, busy working moms like you, is because you see yourself in me. You can relate to me, because I’m not some “perfect”, stuck up, fitness model. I’m just me. So whether you’re a fitness enthusiast, or someone who is just trying to be more active, or a fitness pro, you feel like you can relate to me on some level. That’s what being authentic does for you. You should never trade your authenticity for approval. Just be you!

Embrace where you are right now. Forget about where you used to be. Don’t stress about where you want to be. You don’t have to worry about what anyone else is doing, or how quickly other moms are bouncing back after having a baby. You don’t need to be concerned with how many hours other moms are spending in the gym working out every day. Focus on you! Focus on what’s important and realistic for you.

Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Forget the haters. You are beautiful. You are strong. You are fierce!

So let’s discuss! Which of these statements resonates with you the most? Which one will you be saying today?

Tell me in the comments below!

Please share this post on social media, and help to empower another busy, working mom, who’s trying to stay fit, physically, mentally, and emotionally. We are all in this together! Let’s lift each other up!

*Join my Facebook Group for busy working moms trying to stay fit, physically, mentally, and emotionally, right here!

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